Man's Street Smart

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane...

He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat...

As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his....

.Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "Business trip or pleasure?" She turned, smiled and said, "Business! I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston "

He swallowed hard.. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?""Lecturer," she responded. "I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

"Really?" he said. "And what kind of myths are there?" "Well," she explained, "one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said, "I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don't even know your name.."

"Tonto," the man said, "Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba."

The Best Bak Kut Teh in Penang

This Food Master Bak Kut Teh is the best of all at Penang. Established more then 30 years and had been running with franchised branches in Malaysia, the Philippines and Thailand.

The ingredient is pork rib and pork, the soup is plain, light and would not cause your throat dried and thirsty afterwards. Open from 0700-1200 only.

Location i s opposite EON bank, 192, Jalan Burma (Parma Coffee Garden) , call H/P 016-441 8879 or 016-458 4416.

When a man lies

One day, while a woodcutter was chopping trees above a river, His axe fell into the river.

When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?" The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water.

The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "No.

"The Lord again went down and came up with a silver axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.

Again, the woodcutter replied, "No,"


The Lord went down again and came up with an iron axe. "Is this axe?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to him, and the woodcutter went home happily.

Another day while he was walking with his wife along the riverbank, the woodcutter's wife fell into the river.

He shouted for help, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!" The Lord went down into the water and came up with Pamela Anderson.

"Is this your wife?" The Lord asked. "Yes," cried the woodcutter.

The Lord was furious. "You cheat! That is an untruth!"

The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding.

You see, if I said 'no'to Pamela, You will come up with Kristen Steward. Then if I also say 'no' to her,

You will thirdly come up with my wife, and I will say 'Yes' and then all three will be given to me.

But Lord, I am a poor man and I used to have health issues and I will not be able to take care of all three wives for living and give them the kind of things woman needs!

so *that's* why I said yes this time."


The moral of the story is.......whenever a man lies, it is for an honourable and decent reason.

What is the nail for?

A farmer is giving his wife last-minute instructions before heading to town to do chores.

"That fellow from Sematol will be along this afternoon to inseminate one of the cows. I've hung a nail by the right stall so you'll know which one I want him to impregnate.

"Satisfied that even his mentally challenged wife could understand the instructions, the farmer left for town.

That afternoon, the 'Inseminator' arrives, and the wife dutifully takes him out to the barn and directly to the stall with the nail."This is the cow right here," she tells him.

"What's the nail for?" the guy asks.

Replies the wife, "I guess its to hang up your pants."

Lauee Home Cooking restaurant

Lauee is a home dinning restaurant situated nearby the roundabout heading to Penang Hill.

Reservation is needed, you can not go without local people's guide nor a proper GPS.

Food is kind of Penang class B. but of course can not compare those HK classifictaion. Environment is cozy, the boss is quite a kind of talkative guy, Cantonese, English OK.

A place for friends for Chatting and relaxation!

Pls Call: 016-4322986
Location: Nearby to Penang Hill (Roundabout take 3 o'clock turning if you are coming from Masjid Negeri Road and head straight till you reach the end. It is the house on the left)

Probably The Best Hokkien Noodle in Penang?

We had been spending time to look for the best in Penang including the famous Hokkien Noodles. Friends of Penang brough us to this shop at "One Corner Cafe" behind Hotel Royal down town Pennag City, they Open at 0800 and Close at 1100. Three hours works only!!

We arrived about 10.am and waited at the long queue, until 1045 we had our Penang Special Super Hokkien noodles! Before that,we had finsihed two coffee as we waited for the super-delicious noodles. According our freinds said, the soup is the magic as they prepare the soup by boiling lot of prawns early at morning at five. The guy can turn out a few hundred bowls a day. believe it or not? Today is Thursday, if Saturday, Probably we could not have the luck to taste it unless we reach there earlier in the morning!

mycar

Mycar is the first Hong Kong EV Car. Mycar is an environmental friendly micro-car designed by world-famous automobile designer Giorgetto Giugiaro of Italy. This project has been started since 2003.

EuAuto Technology Limited is a Hong Kong company, having been funded by Innovation and Technology Commission Hong Kong Government, we specialize in design, develop, manufacture and sales of environmentally friendly vehicles for global markets.

The first landmark project is mycar. The styling design was originated by the world class designer - Mr Giorgetto Giugiaro (http://www.italdesign.com/). The electric driving system was co-developed with Hong Kong Polytechnic University. Our team of expertise composes of professionals from Italy, France, Australia and local industries.

Charging 1 hour with have the battery capacity reaching 70%. A Full charge requires 5 hours. Max. Speed is 70km/h. Mycar is made in China.. Mycar is on sales in UK. At £9,995 about HKD$131,151.00

Feverip

Blondes

Watch
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?' 'Hello......,' answered the blond. 'They're watch dogs!'

Blonde on the Sun
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!' The American said, 'We were the first on the moon!' The Blonde said, 'So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!' The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. 'You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!' said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, 'We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!'

Distance
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, 'Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?' The other blonde turns and says 'Hello, can you see Florida?'

Speeding Ticket
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.. She replied in a huff, 'I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!'



Car Trouble
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, 'What's the story?' He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor' She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'



River Walk
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. 'Yoo-hoo!' she shouts, 'How can I get to the other side?' The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, 'You ARE on the other side.'



At the Doctor’s Office
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. 'Impossible!' says the doctor. 'Show me.' The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. The doctor said, 'You're not really a redhead, are you? 'Well, no' she said, 'I'm actually a blonde.' 'I thought so,' the doctor said 'Your finger is broken.'



Knitting
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!' 'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'



In a Vacuum
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, 'If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?' She thought for a time and then asked, 'Is it on or off?'



Sent from Stud Meister from UK.

Restoran Teow Chow Meng Penang

This is Restoran Teow Chow Meng at Old Town of Penang, same Good Quality food as the One I used to go. Recommended placed for Chiu Chow Food.

Dynasty Restaurant at Renaissance Hotel

We had dinner with 6 persons, we opened one bottle of US RED wine HKD400, a plate of Cha Siu (which required to be reserved in advance), the Fish head in clay pot, a special Fish intestine steamed with egg, These are my old town favourite dishes that not commonly available in ordinary restaurant as it reqiuires a lot of works to prepare but can not sell at a decent price!

A clay pot Gan Gong with Chilli and Bean curb paste, half body of roasted chicken, a plate of Century egg and Japanese ginger, a Ger Ger Chicken with Abalone in clay pot... Kuan Yi Tea, rice... ... HKD1,800.00 only!!

Though there is no great sea view, but with Great stuff, great place, and great people serving you like Ophedia, Mira, Peony, Ryan, Chuen... with the Dynasty Cha Siu (Roasted Port) is the BEST in Hong Kong. One of 50 fine-dinning restaurant in HK nominated by HK tourist board, one of the Michelin-recommended restaurants in HK!

5 stars recommedations!

The restaurant is at 4/F of Renaissance Hotel TST new world.

Reservation call 23694111 Renaissance Hotel to transfer.