Saturday, May 7, 2011

How to Win a Promotion!?

Accept The Fact
-When your boss pushes to close for an order to your customer.
He is doing heart selling, if you do the same in front of your boss, your boss will think you are doing hard Selling! This is difference between you and your boss.

- When your boss talks dirty jokes… you should laugh out loud, and if you talks dirty jokes, and he does not smile…. You have better beware!

The boss gets all the best package and remuneration of by removing yours.
-The boss is trying to impose a fair deal to all the employees, trying, as this is a dream!
-You will only have a promotion after a demotion, you boss said.
-When the company share price rises, your number of shares will be reduced proportionally.
-It is always helpless being a small potato in the company for promotion or at least not demotion, but something you may try to change the situation! How?
-The Difference between a boss and subordinates are, he can talk and you listen.
-When your boss is listening to his hand phone… you had better stay 20 metres away! Secrecy!
-When your boss wears a tie, you had better wear one.
-When your boss is standing up after entering to the meeting room, you should not sit down before he does.
-When your boss wears Prada, you wear a Rockport, when he wears Patek Philippe, you wear Seiko, If he wears Seiko, you wear an Patek Philippe… you had better think of your career development in some other company.
-When your boss asks you to order the food, you should be smart to order something delicious, something elegant, something healthy and something cheap!
-When your boss is coming into a door, you should be the one to open the door.
-When he enter the Taxi, you should close the door for him but do not clamp his finger!
-When your boss enters the car, let him sit in the rear side on the Right. You should seat in front of him… as if the car crashes, you are his body air bag.
-When your boss sleeps In the meeting, do not disturb him, pretend you do not know.
-When your boss does presentation, please pretend to write down something… to show you are interested in learning.
-When your boss is running on the trail, you should not surpass him.
-When your boss is in the toilet, you should be the one to leave first and keep door open for him.
-When you boss is walking with a lady in the street, you should pretend seeing nothing.
When your boss is sleeping in the Taxi when it reaches the destination…. Wait until he wakes up himself. Don’t be smart to wake him up.
-When you boss is chairing the meeting, let him sit in the rear facing the entrance.
-When you boss is asking for a bill, you should wait and see signals for his instruction who should be the one to pay… don't be smart to pay first as this makes him lose face in front of customer.
-When you order food in restaurant, avoid, crabs, spicy shrimp, stinky Tou Fu.. Salted fish, oily stuff and something exotic… he might not like… you should keep a recipe of what he likes most.
-When your boss tea cup is 40% empty, it is time for you to fill it up to 90%.
-When you pour beer into boss’s glass, try not make it overrun.
-When you put red wine into you boss glass, try not touch the glass with your bottle, fill up 30% f the glass only…Swing a few rounds of the red wine before passing to him… this shows you care!
-When you boss asks for Sprite mixing with his Chateau Lafifte, do not laugh… say this is the latest Chinese Hi-society trend… and you should follow…
-Make Sure you wash your hand and dry it every time as you may met you Chairman in the corridor. And you will have to hand shaking with him!
-When you travel, so not seat in front of the boss… always try to be three rows behind. Too near, he suspects that you are trying to listening to his discussion with someone. Too far, you seem so not care about him.
-When you moves around in the office, try not to have empty hands, this tells you boss you are having noting to do… fetch a stack of paper or a note book in your hand always.
- Call you boss the name…”Bill!" or Doctor Liu, do not call Mr. Liu, worst is Bill Liu!
Kowloon Snob

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